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Dad Disowned Me Because of My Grandma

DEAR AUNTIE ABENA,

Thanks for the good work. May the good Lord bless you. I’m in a dilemma and I need you and your noble fans to help me with advice after my dad disowned me because of my grandma.

The issue is, my parents divorced when I was a baby. As at that time my mum was still breastfeeding me. They went their separate ways and some years later they both remarried (got married to other people). I had to live with my grandma (my mother’s mother) while they started new families. I lived with her till I completed SHS.

Due to bad marriage, my mum couldn’t take keep up with my upkeep so my grandma did everything for me right from KG to SHS. My father also supported by providing all he could to help me with my education.

After SHS, he told me to go and live with his sister and their mother (my paternal grandma). I didn’t like the idea but I had no other option than to go because I wanted to further my education.

I lived with them in the village for 2 years with many ups and down before he finally came to live with us. It’s been 3 and half years since I moved to the village. I hardly visit my maternal grandma because my father wouldn’t allow me.

One day, I had a call that my maternal grandma is sick and had been admitted at a hospital. I was told on Saturday so I told my father I wanted to visit her at the hospital on Sunday but he said no. The following day Sunday I told him that I wanted to visit her on Monday. Again he said no

This made me really angry and I said to him “wo yɛ me deɛn koraa mɛkɔ” (whatever thing you do me I will go). I went on Monday and returned on Tuesday with my own money. When my father saw me, he told me he has disowned me so I should pack my belongings and go away. He was very serious about it so I told one man who is a very good friend of my father. His advice was that I should apologize

Now my problem is should I apologize for visiting my grandma who had been like my mother all my life or I should pack my belongings and leave? Was it fair to be told not to visit her when she’s sick?

Also this is not the first time he has said to me that he will send me packing. This time though he didn’t just say it he acted on his word. What do I do?

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Written by Abena Magis

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