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I Stayed Even Though He Cheated

DEAR AUNTIE ABENA,

Thanks for your platform where we are able to share our life experiences.

My husband cheated on me with a girl he was helping with her school her fees and everything she needed in school. Before he started helping her, he told me everything about her and how she was struggling to go to school. I felt so much pity for her that I told him to go ahead and help her.

Months later, you could imagine how shocked I was to see the girl’s naked pictures on his phone. I confronted him and he said it was the girl herself who sent them. I asked him to immediately stop helping her. He was doing it out of kindness but I could see she was planning something evil. I called the girl and advised her as a sister to never do that again.

What I didn’t know was that secretly, my husband and her were having an affair to the extend that she wanted to have a baby with him. Last minute, I found out she was still sending naked pictures and confronted him again. This girl heard it and created the impression that I posted her pictures on Facebook which were all lies. I leave all that to God.

I was so hurt that I wanted a divorce but my parents told me this is my trial time in marriage, if I leave II’ll make the devil win. Auntie Abena, my family begged me not to leave for a little girl who is not happy to destroy my happiness. In fact I felt betrayed by my husband who was also my best friend. In all this time he never made me lack or abused me in the marriage.

I stayed because he begged and cried like a baby for the first time telling me he loved me. I asked him whether I had done something to push him away but he said no. When I packed to leave, he actually confessed and said it was his own weakness that led him to do what he did. Mind you the girl’s sisters who are married also encouraged their sister to have an affair with a married man.

All I’m trying to say is sometimes we don’t have to make decisions when we are hurt or not in our right mind to think through our problems. It’s not always that wives push their husbands to cheat but some of them are selfish and lack of self control. I’m now very careful of whom we extend a helping hand to.

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Written by Abena Magis

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