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I Only Want Her Friendship but Might Lose Her

DEAR AUNTIE ABENA,

I saw a post where the lady insulted the man because he refused to take her as side chick. This thing eeerh as if it’s not real. Auntie Abena, it’s real ooo.

There was this lady who was my very good friend. When she confessed love for me I told her the truth that I was dating. She started showing attitude all of a sudden. I respected her a lot and didn’t want to hurt her feelings which is why I told her the truth but she started to reject my calls.

Later, she told me that phone wasn’t working anymore. I had GHS300 so I gave it to her to get herself another phone. That was in 2016. The moment she bought the phone and thanked me, she changed her contact. I managed to get the new contact and call her but the moment she found out, she changed her contact again.

I needed her as my friend so at one time, I even changed my mind to make her my side gal. But I quickly remembered that my mum had always warnedme against wasting a lady’s time and deceiving a kind person. I decided to give up on our friendship.

The problem is; just last 2 weeks, one of my lady friends I really respect asked me straight forward a straightforward question, “do you love me?”

I joked over it and she said I was hurting her feelings. I also said “but you’re dating so why are you asking me this?”
She said that wasn’t the answer to her question. I don’t know her boyfriend but the way she’s acting, I’m sure she’s dating.
I so much like the lady as she’s a very good friend of mine.

She’s also a friend of my woman but my lady hasn’t disclosed our relationship to any of her friends so the lady doesn’t know we’re going out.

Yesterday, about 4AM she called via video call and removed her cloth, displaying her breast during the call. I didn’t say anything about it.

I feel like telling her the truth (not necessary telling her whom I’m dating) but the fear of losing our friendship is always on my mind. My past experience has got me thinking a lot. But I’m the kind of person who don’t want to hurt women as such.

Not that I’m “jon” guy ooo I can play this game pass her koraa but I wanna respect my relationship, and I don’t wanna hurt her. Please is there a way I can tell her so she won’t be offended? Mano fans, sorry for the long post.

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Written by Abena Magis

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