DEAR AUNTIE ABENA,
I want to highlight something in this platform, and this goes to both the men and women: don’t try to relate somebody’s situation and people’s comments posted to yours when it comes to judgement in your relationship but try to take the positivity and negativity to shape your relationships.
My story goes like this: I have been on this page for quite a long time, and have been reading people’s stories and comments, so it really ate into me to the extent of making me break away from a 3 years well built relationship because of a small misunderstanding I had with the love of my life (Racer).
I was the one at fault but I felt very proud and had this thing that most of the ladies in this group say “no man can control my life.” This pride made me feel on top so he said things he wasn’t supposed to say to me because I made him feel very hurt. He later apologized so many times but I told him it’s over because I was feeling on top, and when you are having that ego and mindset you don’t see you are wrong.
During that time also, a lot of men were proposing to me and those men were rich while he is a normal guy trying to make it in life, so I had a mindset that anytime he did something I didn’t like, I will base on that and call for a breakup.
I intentionally provoked him so that he will fall in the trap and truly he did so. I thought it was a done deal because I was going to get someone better than him. I started doing the very stuff, the love of my life was shaping me not to. Stuff like clubbing, drinking, going out etc since I wasn’t under shaping anymore.
After a year, I have realized I have left gold to pick stones. In just a year, I have dated 4 different men. My life also is in a mess, I cry every day and I am depressed. I have learnt my lessons that sometimes when a man tries to act wild and very manipulative, it’s not all the time we women should see it as controlling.
It’s sometimes called shaping us into the right direction because we women are very vulnerable, so without this shaping, it will be hard for us to fall into the right track sometimes. Some men are once in a lifetime and if you lose them, you’ll lose a planet. Sometimes in a relationship, God makes some things happen to test your loyalty, trust, forgiveness, endurance and never give up spirit.
I have seen that there is no perfect relationship but it’s up to the two of you to make it a wonderland. My ex is on this platform, and I want all of you to help me beg him. I call him Racer and he calls me Sucre. Please forgive me and take me back because without you now, I am empty.