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My Abortion Story – He Doesn’t Want Me and I Don’t Want the Baby

DEAR AUNTIE ABENA,

I’m one of the top fans of your page.

I’m usually the type to keep quiet over things but this is killing me inside out.

I met this man late January this year. At the time he proposed love to me I didn’t accept because I wasn’t ready for a relationship since I was barely a month out of a very toxic one.

This man did his possible best to win me over and though I liked him, I just wouldn’t budge because I was afraid. Fast forward, I deleted his number after a few weeks when he tried forcing himself on me in his car while friend of his was around.

We lost communication after that but 5 months later, I got a text from him saying he had changed and he had done a lot of thinking during the quarantine. That he wanted to be a good man to me and help me further my education (I had earlier told him I wanted to further my education). I thought to myself that maybe he meant his words so I gave him a chance and that was exactly on September 8 of this year.

Auntie Abena, this man was a good man to me until I took seed on the 11th of October after getting intimate with him. He told me he wasn’t ready for the pregnancy even though I wanted to keep it. He said I had to continue my education too. I can’t even express the pain I felt in my heart and the tears I shed but I agreed and then his doctor prescribed a dosage for me to take in.

That night he was there when I bled while having labour contractions but the bleeding stopped that night. I didn’t bleed the next day, I told him and he “seemed” worried yet wouldn’t put aside his work to take me to a doctor. I had to drink herbal tonics myself because I knew if I didn’t, the “dead baby” would infect my womb and I might not give birth again. I bled for six days afterwards.

Let’s chat on Hujambo

Auntie Abena, as I write this, there’s this strong urge of killing myself because the man that said he loved me, was serious about me, wanted the best for me, has blocked my numbers on WhatsApp and normal calls.

I’m sorry if my story is long, please bear with me. We were talking alright and well even after the abortion until he contracted Covid-19. On the day he went for a checkup, surprisingly, my phone’s screen broke. The following days were hell for me as this man wouldn’t pick up my calls nor reply my SMS. I was scared and worried.

The last time he texted me back, he said that he had lost his voice and couldn’t talk that’s why he wasn’t picking up my calls. Even with that I still kept on calling until after two weeks, he finally picked and said he had been admitted at Ridge Hospital. That night my heart felt like it was almost failing.

This is a man I genuinely love who’s battling with life and death. Because of the abortion, I have developed the complications of heart palpitations when I think too much or hear bad news. Fast forward Auntie, I repaired my phone only to come back online and still be ignored by him.

It’s been a month now. He doesn’t pick my calls and the last time I sent him a pile of messages on how he’s hurting me, all he said was he went through a traumatic period with the covid so he wants to be alone and that he’s ignoring everyone not just me. Auntie Abena, I’m hurt because I’m still pregnant. The baby is still growing inside of me. I’m afraid of giving birth to a deformed baby so I texted him about my tummy growing, tender breasts and still pregnant and that I wanted a DNC.

He’s blocked me 😭😭blue ticked all my texts and voice notes pleading with him to give me money for a DNC. He can just go his way but I want this baby out of me😭he’s blocked me, my body, heart and soul hurt. Adding salts to injury, my mom seeing I’m pregnant has been saying all sorts of stuff to me.

She wants me out if I don’t abort the baby and also has said I’m not her child. I want to die Auntie. I feel like there’s no place for me on this earth again. I feel like I will get mad anytime from now while walking on the streets. I haven’t slept the whole night.

I asked a friend to hook me up with her male friends so I sleep with them and raise money for the DNC. I feel broken because I have no one apart from my mom and myself 😭😭I’m just 20 and he’s 32 Auntie Abena, it’s not like this man can’t afford a DNC. He’s a chartered accountant and a contractor and does other businesses as well.

I don’t know what I’ve done so wrong to him that I disgust him now and wants to jeopardize my whole life for me 😭

Want to share your story anonymously? Kindly send to manokekame@gmail.com or send us a message to Hujambo by clicking HERE.

Written by Abena Magis

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  1. How could u be ds careless a man dat tried to rape u in a car changed??? Mmaa paaa. Anyway guys let’s help her bf we get 2 hear bad news on ds page.

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