DEAR AUNTIE ABENA,
Please I want to know how you and your fans think about this. I’m a nurse and will be 30 years next month. I’ve been dating my boyfriend for 8 years now in fact 14th of February will be our 8 years of dating. Anytime I ask him when are we getting married, his reactions and the things he says makes me think he is not ready for marriage now. When his mother asked me when we are getting married and I responded that her son is scared of marriage, she laughed.
Currently he is not in the country. He travelled to the U.K to further his education but before he was about leaving we talked about him coming to see my parents. Our pastor’s wife even called him and told him to do the needful before leaving. He said ok but refused to come with his parents to see mine. He later gave an excuse that his father said he couldn’t make it because he had a funeral to attend. Can you imagine?
Now he is done with his masters but says he won’t come back to Ghana so I should find ways and means of going over there. We had been talking on phone a lot but one day he called and started talking about wanting to marry someone for papers. I was shocked so we argued. What he told me was he’s not gotten the right person yet but my opinion doesn’t matter. Hmm.
Auntie Abena do you know something, in our first year of dating my sister wanted me to go to the U.K to marry her friend for papers but I turned that opportunity down. I did remind him of it but he told me mine is different from his because he knows the person personally but with mine, I didn’t know him personally. So I said if that is what he is saying then it’s ok.
He used to stay at an apartment close to the school but after he graduated, he was given a letter to leave the building because it was given to some company. Therefore, he moved in with a colleague at work, a 41 year old Ghanaian lady with a 4 year old daughter but told me he rented the place.
He’s now switched all his attention to the lady’s daughter and calls me once a day. Even on his off days he still doesn’t call. I had to complain about it before it went back to normal. He now bathes the lady’s daughter, brushes her teeth, prepares her breakfast, feeds and takes her to school before going to work. This has been going on for months now.
He now uses the lady’s address to receive parcels. I asked him why he is using her address and he told me he’s yet to get a tenancy agreement. I just don’t know what to think or do and need advice.