My Husband’s “Friend” is Refusing to Back Off


How are you doing? Please I seek advice. Thank you for the platform.

I am a married woman and blessed in many ways but about two years ago, I noticed my husband had gradually become friends with a lady he introduced a business to.

Slowly their phone calls and chats shifted from business talks to something I didn’t find pleasing. Mind you my husband doesn’t hide his phone from me. We both even use the same password.

I chanced on some of their convos in which this lady was asking my husband if he had taken his bath. At other times too, she called him about 5 times a day just to check on him. They mostly chat late into the night like say 11:30 pm. When I noticed this, I confronted him and told him I wasn’t comfortable with the kind of friendship he has with the lady. He promised to keep some distance.

Afterwards, it’s rather the lady who does the calling and texting. I told my husband that some of us women like to stick to places of comfort even though it might cause harm to others. He is the quite and reserved type who doesn’t even complain when jeez not comfortable with something and it’s very worrisome to me.

Last year December, I confronted her with my number and told her politely that I am handling things at home but I wanted her to be aware that I wasn’t buying that kind of friendship. She said stuff to me, blocked me then went straight to my husband’s WhatsApp to report me.

Little did she know I was holding his phone so I told her to respect my decision. There’s a lot I can’t write but I want to know if I did wrong by confronting her? Also she has taken it upon herself to do things that I am against. Things like tagging him or commenting under every post he makes on Facebook or his WhatsApp status. I know it’s quite normal for someone to do that but it becomes unusual when it’s very consistent for years.

NB: she is a divorcee with two children.

She isn’t totally at fault but I also expect her to understand my point of view if she didn’t have anything else in mind. My husband is equally at fault. Maybe I’ll use the term that he’s too timid. Was I bad for thinking that way? Am I overreacting or? What do your fans suggest I do? Thank you.

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Written by Abena Magis


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