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My Niece Lied to Me

DEAR AUNTIE ABENA,

Hmmm in this world, is it a sin to help people or not? My story goes like this…

I have a half sis. My mum already had her when she married my dad with her. Dad treated us equally without bias. For my parents’ side we are just two me and my bro, with my half sister making us three.

I am the last born and the very first person to complete tertiary. I help my siblings in terms of money and everything else. My half sister has a daughter who’s about to complete school next year.

I am married with one kid. I make my niece come to my house to help me in caring for my boy when I go to work because I’m a nurse.

Auntie Abena, hmm the way I treat this niece of mine like my own. Even my other documents I have her name on it, as my ssnit beneficiary and a few other documents.

When she’s about to go to school, I buy her a lot of provisions to cater for the whole term. I make her do her list of items she needs for school and even top up, give her money for school and every three weeks send her extra money.

My sis was jobless then but when she finally got one her pay wasn’t satisfying so me and my bro add up. Our mum is late for almost 12 years now. My family members didn’t support us though they had money.

My dad was the only person who supported us through the journey when mum was not alive. Sometimes I used to cry and ask myself indeed I have people I can call my family.

The auntie who follows my mum has just has just one kid who is working. We thought she would have supported us plus her son but she didn’t. Moreover when I was younger, during vacation she would invite me to her house to cook, wash and even wash her son’s clothes for him. I didn’t think anything negatively about it because they are my family.

Yet, when I was about to go to school or return to home she would tell me she doesn’t have money. Though she won’t buy any new items for you, she will buy things for herself and claim broke when it’s time to go.

After all this time, my sister and her daughter are living with her. We all know her behavior. Meanwhile she’s rich. Yo cut long story short, during the covid 19 pandemic when schools were all closed down, I told my niece to come to my place.

She attends school in a different region. I sent her money for TNT but she didn’t show up that that day. Morever she called that she was coming straight to my end. She rather went to Accra where my aunt lives. This woman isn’t happy anytime my niece wants to come to me for a visit. Meanwhile when school reopens she won’t give her anything for school, not even 1 cedi.

I’ve been the one sending her money for provisions and school money. My sister was not making enough money from her work so everything was on me. Even her admission to SHS thank God it was Free education though my brother and I still contributed for her to go.

So called this girl several times but she didn’t pick up. I chatted her but she didn’t reply meanwhile she was on whatsapp. I messages her again to send back my TNT. She didn’t so I allowed her to keep the money.

I called my Aunt to allow my niece to come because I was about resuming work from my leave so whiles school is not in session she could help cater for my son.

My aunt told me she can’t let her come because Accra was in a pandemic than any other place. My husband’s friend went to Accra. When he was returning, I called her again to let my niece join him. She still refused to allow that. I was very upset but didn’t talk.

When school was about to reopen, this same niece of mine called that when she asked my aunt for some money and provisions for school, she told her she didn’t have money. My niece said I should please send her some money. I sent her some and she went to school.

I called my sister and told her that next time she should let her daughter come straight to my place than going to my aunt’s place. We also this woman would only use her for house chores and tell my niece different stories when she is ready to go to school. She said ok and we agreed.

Just 2 days ago, my niece called and we discussed about her coming over to my place. She told me she won’t go to Accra, she’s coming straight from school to my place because when she goes to Accra my aunt won’t let her come to me. I sent her money for her TNT and told her to call me this morning (they vacated last week) to come to my place.

I told her to call me when she arrives. I called my sister too. She agreed for her daughter to come to me on the condition that I would let her go for classes. I told her she doesn’t have problem with that. Moreover this Christmas there wouldn’t be any classes until the Christmas festivities are over.

Auntie Abena do you know that the girl didn’t come? She didn’t even both to call and tell me that she wants to go to Accra first. I was left wondering because we discussed everything that when she arrives at my hood she should call me. So I called my sister and her response was like she also discussed with my niece that she should come to Accra. She said yes she’s in Accra. I said ok and cut the line.

Now this is the second time my niece have been truthful to me. My question is should I call her to send me the TNT money or I should wait a little if she would come or not or I should not say anything. Do I have to still give her money the next time she calls me for money for school or I should not.

Note…..I send her money for provisions and fare to school.

When she got to Accra yesterday neither her or my sister called to let me know she’s in there. I had to call first before they confirmed.

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Written by Abena Magis

Comments

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    • Once bitten twice shy, Dear let the past remain where it belongs to and let us focus on the future so let her keep the transport fare and Never bother yourself telling her to come over to your place , she will be like you are trying to force her to be in your house to take care of your son and your place for you. So please find a different way of dealing with the issue of looking after your son whiles you are off to work and forget about them, they are not grateful for the efforts you and your brother are putting in place to the betterment of her own life and well being.

  1. My dear forget about her and manage your family without any third party. For all you know she has a boyfriend at your aunty place which makes her always to go there. If u need any one to assist you,am there kk

  2. Forget about her and your half sister. If she calls for money/provisions just ignore her, they are just ungrateful and are taking you for a fool. You can get paid help if you are in dire need of one my dear.

  3. All is said. Let them be.. plan your family chaos according to your work and manage them.. they are surely taking you for a ride and also your niece definitely has boyfriend in the hood of your auntie.. consider them as Babylons.. negative people

  4. My question is why do u help her with her school stuff?
    If it’s because she helps u during vacations then u can stop whatever u do for her. But if it’s because she is family, then u have no case.
    So ask urself why u do all those things for her and the mother.
    Remember in ur submission u were accusing ur family for not helping u guys when u needed help.

  5. Dear sis I will say they are all using you. Your niece cannot go to aunty’s without the knowledge of her mother. It’s a planned thing and only God knows what their reasons are. First of all don’t entertain your niece again, never call her again to come or give her the go ahead to come. They’re rather thinking you want to use her. Regarding her school stuffs, let them deal with it since your sister didn’t also bother to scold her daughter for lying to you or tell you she will be going to your aunty, it means they’re playing you so just cut yourself from them before they play you more for their selfish gains

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