DEAR AUNTIE ABENA,
Hmmmm. I have an issue which is really eating me up nowadays and making me sick as well.
I’m 25 years and in one of the public universities in Ghana now, currently in leveI 300. I have this man who has been sponsoring my education. He is 54 years.
This man has really been good to me ever since I met him. Due to that, I left my ex just to be with the man. My ex was a great guy, very loving and caring but he was financially down. He couldn’t even provide daily meals. He knew about my sponsor and didn’t support the idea that my Sponsor was the one taking care of my school needs and all what I needed in life.
This led to a lot of issues between us. I clearly understood him though because it’s very painful to date a lady who’s having an an affair with another man. I told my boyfriend that since my education was my biggest priority he should understand the situation. He couldn’t handle or tolerate so we called the relationship off and went our separate ways.
I lost my dad at a tender age. My mom is alive but can’t shoulder the burden of my education. In my family, if you want to have a good life, you have to struggle and make it. I have no one to help me. I worked at so many places just to save something for my schooling but the money wasn’t enough. All these sum up to the reasons why I decided to be with this man for his help auntie Abena.
The main problem why I’m even here is, this man brought in a proposal which is really killing me slowly.
That is, he wants me to give him a child. He perfectly understands that we can’t get married in future as he himself said too. His reasons for this proposal is that he doesn’t have a child here in Ghana. His two daughters are with their white mum (wife) outside the country
Please my problem is I don’t want to have different fathers for my children. Also, he’s somehow autocratic type although he has a very good heart. My fear now is I don’t know whether to oppose his proposal or accept it.
I’ve always been submissive to whatever he asks me to do and he thinks I will do same to this one as well. But seriously, I can’t abide to this. My dilemma is I don’t want to break up with him because of my schooling and I don’t also need a child for now.
Please advise me on what to do now because I’m in a devastated state now. Insults are also welcome from advisors 🙏 Thanks.