DEAR AUNTIE ABENA,
I’m a very private person but sometimes something can be very heavy on your heart that you wouldn’t know whom to turn to. Because of my status I prefer not to consult a counselor but seek public opinion on my issue.
I’m 43 years and married to a 31 year old lady. I’ve known her for 5 years and we’ve been married for 2 years. She was going out when we met which she was truthful enough to tell me. She was in school then so I would sometimes remit her which was how her mother got in touch with me and her family preferred me for her because I was serious about her. Her boyfriend at that time was also a student but though working wasn’t able to help her out.
I’m ashamed to say that I literally forced her hand to break up with the guy by setting up some movements. First, I moved her out of the hostel to an apartment, gave her an iPhone and monthly stipend including clothing allowance. This tipped things in my favor and I was able to have my way by sleeping with her and that’s how I got to answer her call one morning when he called and told him she’s asleep. This led to the logical conclusion of them having to break up.
Since we got married, I realized she wasn’t happy because though she respects me and does everything a woman should do for her man, there is this part of her emotions that I can’t touch. I got to know how much she’d been affected by all these when her ex who’s now married to an older woman came back into her life. She smiles more with me and is more fun because I told her to feel free to chat with him.
Her birthday was on the 3rd and I as usual took her on a trip and asked her what her wish was. She told me she can’t tell me because I’ll be offended. Her refusal to tell me got me angry that I cut short our trip. It’s after we got back that she told me she wants to have one last sex with her ex because she keeps dreaming about him. Since she knows it’ll be unfair to do that, she’s willing to let me sleep with her ex’s wife who is for the idea.
I said what? I’m well traveled and have heard of all these things but I never dreamt a Ghanaian woman who is married will tell me this. I made her call the ex and he told me he’ll understand if I say no because it’s my wife that came up with the idea. I asked for a meet up and my first time seeing his wife, I wanted her. Maybe it’s because of the subject matter or the thought of doing something like this but I’m highly thinking of doing this but I’m worried too.
Why will my wife want to do this? Is this punishment for setting up her breakup in order to pave way to marry her? It’s not that I’ve been faithful to her but I always keep it away from her. What are the implications? I know this is wrong but why am I so tempted? God help me and your fans too.