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THE WEDDING TALK SERIES: My Sister Wanted Things A Certain Way.

Sometimes the people who are meant to be in your corner are there; pretending to be there for you but they have their own agenda. My sister is someone who has always wanted the best for me and so it was natural to fall back on her for advice during my wedding planning. She was the eldest and had been married three years prior and she had done so well with her planning. On her wedding day, everything had turned out great, she also didn’t fret about anything as she just went about enjoying her day.

As such, when my turn came around, I believed her opinions and suggestions would see me through. The first day we sat down to discuss some ideas with her, I felt things had gone on well but my husband came telling me he didn’t like how my sister was acting all bossy about something which wasn’t even for her or totally about her. I told him I understood his point of view but then we needed someone who had done this before.

Early the next morning, my sister woke me up with her calls. She asked me to come over to her home. I told her I had a few errands to run and also had to drop off some work assignments so we should do it the next day, which was a Saturday. She got annoyed and told me Saturday wouldn’t work for her, she would be seeing to her son’s haircut. The place they had my nephew’s haircut is a bit far from where they lived so I could understand. I told her we could make it on Sunday after church but that was also met with another objection.

In fact, I had a lot on my plate but my sister made me aware that it was that Friday or nothing else. She kept saying what she had to show me was very important. So, after making my rounds and dropping off my work assignments, I sat in a car which got stuck in traffic for almost three hours before finally getting to my sister’s area. Immediately I got to the house, I slumped into a chair. She failed to see how tired I was and brought out a big book.

The book contained all her wedding ideas and designs. I was a little offended. Acting as if I didn’t have a brain which included my desires, thoughts and wishes. I offered my thanks and told her we didn’t have to go by exactly what she had done. I was tired so I wasn’t thinking straight. She convinced me that if we wanted a beautiful day with beautiful memories, then her way was the way to go. I gave in and said okay.

She jumped to the helm of affairs. When anyone else made even a suggestion, she would quickly write it off with the excuse that it wasn’t the way to go. Showing the estimated expenses to my husband, he was livid. Who and who was going to pay for the wedding? Weren’t we supposed to have something within our means? I was torn between my sister’s way and that of my husband’s.

What brought me to reality was when I began supplementing what had to be given for each part of the wedding. When it got to the food and my dresses, she said the budget wasn’t enough and that we had to calculate for about 200 people plus. I was amazed. Then she looked at pictures of my preferred wedding dress and said it wouldn’t do for my figure.

I snatched the sheets from her hands and told her that it was okay. My husband and I would take it up from there. I spoke to my husband and he was glad I had come to my senses. We made things work. We went a little over our budget but it was better than most of the suggestions of my sister. People came up to me later to tell me how beautiful I looked in my dress, I don’t know what they would have said if they had seen what my sister had proposed. She was offended with me but she came around after a while.

Written by Esther

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