Joojo was the perfect gentleman, and the ladies’ man. He knew how to “toast” ladies and the ladies were all over him. I was happy when I he decided to be with me, in a relationship. I couldn’t believe how lucky I was. The almighty Joojo, was all mine, my boyfriend. He would always send me sweet messages, he would call me and he would tell me how much he loved me.
He really knew how to treat a woman. He knew how to wine and dine me, how to talk and even how to have fights in a relationship. He was indeed the man of my dreams and the perfect one. The day he asked me to marry him, you should have seen me. All sweet and emotional and shouting “yes, yes, yes”. I couldn’t believe how lucky I had been. I would be daydreaming about our upcoming wedding and I would think about how our children would look once we started having kids.
Wedding stress didn’t catch me ooh, my perfect gentleman saw to it that everything went on smoothly. If he felt something was getting to me, we would talk about it and find a way to make things work in my favour. Other times too, he’d take it upon himself to do what needed to be done. When I complained about something, he would allow me to talk all I wanted then he would say soothing things to me.
I was pampered and treated like a baby. Whenever I think about all these, it just makes my head feel so big. So, on the wedding day, I walked down the aisle, more than ready to tie the knot and start my new life with my Mr Right. As we were being advised, my mind was far away. When we exchanged our vows you can guess where my mind really was. When we were signing the certificate, I was doing countdown to finish in church and go have a good time.
When everything at church was done and we were leaving the church premises, all I could say was, “Phew, Finally!” I was the newest Mrs in town and I proudly linked my arm through his as we walked amidst shouts of “Ayefro ooooh” and “Dondoo” to the car. Let me pause here, a friend told me “Dondoo” really means: “you don’t know”. It’s true. I didn’t know what I had signed up for.
As we sat in the car, we were photographed for a while and then waited for our driver who was nowhere to be found. In the car, we took a few selfies and just as we started kissing, there was this smell that filled the car. Immediately, I pulled back, and rolled the glass down for fresh air. “Eei, na ɛdeɛbɛn nie?”
Then, a second time, just as we got into it, it happened again, this time, it was worse than the first. I saw the driver approaching and panicked so I locked the car from inside. When he tried opening the car and it didn’t work, I put on a smile and asked him to give us a few minutes. Then turning to my husband, I stared at him with disgust and anger,he looked at me and asked, “What?” I didn’t know how to ask him but I said, “Did you…..” He made a face and said, “Oh but you, we have to feel free now”
We had never had a situation where the other passed air in the presence of the other. It was something new and I wouldn’t have been so bothered if it had happened somewhere else. After a few minutes, we called the driver to come. I can’t tell whether he smelled anything or not but he didn’t say or show any emotion on his face. I was a bit annoyed and expressed my displeasure. Sometimes, when I think about that moment, it makes me know he wasn’t so perfect after all.